How to Cook a Turkey
- Purchase turkey. You have not thought far enough ahead to get a good one, so make do with what you have.
- You forgot to pre-heat the oven, didn’t you? Whatever, just turn the oven up to 450 degrees, it’l warm in no time.
- Thaw the turkey before cooking. You can do this in the oven while it heats up.
- wait around, bake your desserts. That stuffing needs to be made.
- Watch some football on TV
- You forgot about the turkey. Examine your burned-outside, frozen-inside specimen of ex-edible dinner.
- Turn off all kitchen hardware and pile everyone in the lap. Little Johnny can sit on his older sister’s lap.
- Drive the family to the local Chinese Restaurant
- Enjoy a delicious thanksgiving dinner!